Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Dear Fireplace

Dear Fireplace,

You are the bright shiny pillar in my house. You are full of warmth and you have big pretty flames. If only you were wood burning I would throw things in you and make a really big fire. Perhaps God was inspired when he led me to this house and it only had a gas fireplace.

Did you know that if you chop up an entire Christmas tree and throw it in a fireplace all at once it makes really really big flames and they even come out of the fireplace and make you wonder if you are going to burn the house down despite using the fireplace? Now you do. Apparently it is not the best idea to burn a Christmas tree in the house. And it will burn the carpet in the vicinity of the fireplace.

My friend Mark has great bonfires too. I helped load wood on the fires at his house. I once threw on like 2 or 3 pallets at once. Amelia called us both pyros. We did get the flames like 20 feet high. But there was one dumb guy who decided to jump through the flames and singed off his eyebrows.

Anyways fireplace. Thanks for being here for me today. I am laying by you as we speak.

Your Admirer,


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