Friday, December 30, 2011

Dear Santa,

Dear Santa,

I realize it's a little late for this year, but I came up with a late Christmas wish list, maybe it will work for next year, maybe not:

1. I would like my sister Christine to give the evil meowing cat that your "elf" left under the Christmas tree to Jake for his birthday. I know it's regifting, but I think it will be given just as much love as it's gotten at her house.

2. I would like Becca to get some sort of skimpy shirt or funny item. I usually get her a gag gift of some kind, but it just didn't happen this year. I ran out of energy.

3. I would like a baby cow. I don't know where I'd put it, but Ang has a strip of grass. Her neighbors wouldn't mind right?

4. A baby lamb would be cute too. They are hard to kill right? They are the size of a small dog, surely one could go in the yard too?

5. I really think I should get another patio pool. I miss my old one. It was super fun. I just hope I don't lose my top in it this time. I realize it is funny, but lets just say I prefer that it stay on my body.

6. When I get a new yard, I want a peach and nectarine tree. But you probably shouldn't bring them for me because I will buy them myself. If you could provide a love slave to help plant them, that would be much appreciated.

7. Do you think you could give me a fireman's pole? It might be fun, or I might hurt myself...most likely I'll hurt myself. But ya gotta live right?

8. I think my sister Ang would love one of those obnoxious screaming witch candy/toys. The one she so beloved somehow got thrown in the trash. Every time someone slammed a door it would scream. I know she loved it. I thought about getting it out of the trash for her and hiding it in her room or under her pillow. If you bring her one, please make sure you put it somewhere like under her bed or behind her dresser in some hard to reach place. She loves to hear it scream.

9. My sister Jenny would like something cool too. Maybe you've got a cool game like Operation Zombie or Monopoly Farms? Or you could bring her Just Dance 3? I think she needs to practice so when she comes to visit I won't beat her at it. It is a super fun game.

10. My dad would like a new dollhouse toilet. The one that belonged to the toy dollhouse at his house unfortunately got flushed down the toilet during our family christmas party and he had to remove the toilet and run a snake through it to get it out. The dollhouse one is now somewhere like the landfill.

Thanks for all the nice gifts you gave me this year. I am grateful for them.

Thank you for your consideration of these things in the future,

Love,

Les

Thursday, December 1, 2011

Dear Becca,

Dear Becca,

Happy birthday late! I meant to post this a few days ago but I wasn't feeling very good and my bed and sleep called to me instead. I did call you though.

Anyways I'm glad you're my sister. You're kind and giving and you can make my nails super pretty. And you love me even when I burp happy birthday to you. Well, actually I've never done that but I know you'd still love me if I did.

I remember some fun times we had together. The hide and seek in the dark which mom and dad forbid us to play anymore because of damage to the house and their christmlas tree. I loved the karaoke and the special Christmas gives we give each other.

Anyways, I love you.

Love,

Les