Dear Canyon Bicycles

Dear Canyon Bicycles,

Thank you ever so much for getting the devil pedals off my old bike and onto the new. I can only imagine the damage I would've done had I attempted to get them off all on my own. Best of all, you did it for free. Thank you!!!

And can I say, my mom and I love your store way better than the other store we shall not name. You have great customer service and you custom ordered new thorn resistant tires for her bike. We appreciate that. The other store told us there was nothing they could do. I'm glad they were wrong. We were getting tired of her tires going flat all the time.

And I should thank you for taking a large chunk of my money too. Lets admit it, the nicer you are, the more we probably spend. Now could you send a really hot man biker who is single with a real job my way? And while I am sending requests, can you please make sure he has 2 eyes, a short term memory, no strange tatoos, ears that are not pierced, and maybe he could own a wii? I know the wii is stretching it a bit, but since I was making the list, I thought I'd throw that in.

Also, I should thank you Canyon. I think you've blown my June book budget. New bike = no new books. If I buy any books in June, please dear family, beat me. But not with anything hard that will hurt or break me. Maybe a water noodle made of foam.

Your new loyal customer,

Les