Dear classified ad shoppers,

Dear Classified Ad Shoppers,

Please allow me to enlighten you on a few things:

1. If it is a large heavy object such as a weight machine, why would you suggest I deliver it to your house to try out to decide whether or not you want it?

2. If I list something for cheap, do you what makes you think I'll deliver it? I just want to get rid of it.

3. I will not hold something. Chances are you may not show up. So I might as well give it to whoever shows up with the cash first.

4. People don't write checks any more. If you don't have cash, you don't get the item.

5. Calls while I, and most normal people, are sleeping are not nice.

6. If something sells before you are able to buy it, get over it. It is rude and unacceptable to pitch a fit since the item never belonged to you.

7. If you've already paid and you change your mind, you've just given me a birthday present of cash. Thanks.

8. If the item is already super cheap, there will be no negotiations. Take it or someone else will.

9. If you call and ask dumb questions, I will give you dumb answers.

10. If you ask the same dumb questions again, you'll get the same answers.

Les